“Have you had you any lesser crime in London?”, was the question launched on Twitter by the newspaper The New York Times, in the face of growing concern over the wave of crime sweeping the british capital.
instead of taking it to the tremendous, the londoners have preferred to sharpen the art of sarcasm. I have here a collection of petty crimes one hundred by one hundred londoners, collected with patience by Martin Belam at The Guardian…
“A kind stranger tried to talk to me on the subway and I reported, because talking to strangers in the subway is illegal”.
“oh, Six pounds for a pint of beer! Now that is a theft to the full light of day!”.
“I Left my umbrella for cheap at the entrance and at the exit I caught another one, more expensive, more durable and more eye-catching. How is that a crime?”.
“Two guys with their backpacks got round and round on themselves, when they traveled on the train in rush hour, beating the passengers and creating a tension that could have escalated”.
“What would you charge in the cinema for some popcorn. An assault with night and treachery!”.
“I Ordered a milk tea and I was served before the milk it Unforgivable!”.
“I Remember that during the Olympic Games, the people you smiled and you spoke to on the subway. I still have nightmares”.
“Someone opened me the door when I had three meters to reach, and I had to run and above thank you”.
“I Went out to eat at my local pub and they told me that they had finished the porridge and the boiled lamb. Di immediately to the police.”
the Moral of the story: if you are coming to London this Christmas tráiganse the umbrella and ándense with four eyes, but don’t hesitate to smile at strangers, especially now that it is a crime.
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