We know the voice of Ali Rebeihi, 49, thanks to the program Grand bien vous faire! on France Inter; we now discover his pen. With a first thriller whose heroine is a retired criminology teacher, “Aunt Alice”, half-Miss Marple, half-Agatha Raisin, in a (fictional) gentrified village in the forest of Fontainebleau. It is also a “cosy crime” which is intended to be English, but which any Englishman would unmask immediately by crying sacrilege – Rebeihi indeed serves scones there… with chocolate chips! The radio man also has the good taste to wring the neck of Paul Faye, “the pope of benevolent meditation, renowned on the left”, author of the bestseller The Five Celtic Truths, a “mystical-philosophical porridge for stressed city dwellers. Settling a score with a wellness guru is exhilarating, and rest assured, it’s not over, there’s more! Behind the tree, Rebeihi deploys the forest of celebrations of our time: the keto diet, EMDR, couples therapy and monastic retreats… We can no longer be in tune with the times.
Killer Snippet: Alice Bonneville couldn’t miss the big, sweaty guy in a tight tracksuit, Yorkie on a leash, walking towards her. Impossible to pretend she hadn’t seen him toss his empty packet of cigarettes between the ferns and the bell heather. She had just finished her daily hike under an orange-grey sky, still amazed to have been able to observe two young deer through binoculars. A pure joy of existing had seized her throughout her walk. This bastard had ruined everything. She closed her eyes and tried to reason with herself. No my darling, you won’t seize this log at your feet, you won’t take your momentum to become the armed arm of Nemesis, the Greek goddess of revenge, or her most devoted servant. You won’t hit it with the strength of the greatest baseball batsman of all time. You won’t become the undisputed specialist in human head chopping. Reluctantly abandoning these destructive ideas, Alice walked over to the guy in the Yorkie and pulled out his Valmont-sur-Loing book club card. CCTV cameras recorded your criminal act. Dear sir, you have a choice: immediately pick up the packet of cigarettes you have just thrown away or pay a fine of four hundred and fifty euros. This is a flagrante delicto, article R.633-6 of the Penal Code. We accept payment by credit card. The man stared at her beyond the prescribed time. Beautiful pearl gray eyes but really the wrong face, Alice thought. What if she had stumbled upon a serial killer of middle-aged women? Without a word, he retraced his steps, picked up the object of the offense and, with worrying placidity, continued to be dragged by his pug. Usurpation of function, it should seek in the three years of imprisonment and forty-five thousand euros fine. – I’m going to tell you a secret, threw Alice, if the law allowed it, you would be banned from the forest for life. His audacity made her shudder. She quickened her pace to go home and prepare a good meal. Without noticing the knife unearthed by a pack of wild boars, the murder weapon that had killed Paul Faye.
