Loreto Sesma: Sometimes I try to hide my insecurity in a tube dress

Loreto Sesma (Zaragoza, 1996).
She referring to the new generation of best selling poets that have been made known through social networks.
At 17, she published her first book and at 21, she won the City of Melilla award.
Despite her youth, she already has an essay and five poemaries in bookstores.
The last, it was not enough to love (Verso & Tale).

QUESTION.
In your new poems you speak of the power of memory.
What do I remember the one who always returns to your mind?

ANSWER.
Everybody.
I have always been a task of studying things from the brain and I found a syndrome, which is called hypertise, which affects people making them have a special capacity to revive moments.
If I, for example, five years ago I lived that my father had died – this I am inventing it, eh- I am able to suffer exactly as I suffered that day.
Therefore, for me the subject of time and memory is a problem, because you are accumulating lashes throughout your life.

Q. Does it happen to you all the time?

A. Yes, I’m doing anything and, suddenly, the flash comes and it affects me.
Maybe I trust someone, it happens to me, and I’m distrusting.
That’s where another move enters, which is the subject of forgiveness.
Do not forgive
I really think I do not.

Q. How do you mark this when writing?

R. More than when writing, because in the end I write everything that happens to me, it has changed me a lot when it comes to loving people.
I have become someone super selective when it comes to saying: You do not.

Q. Why are you starting to write?
What was the first impulse?

A. My first memory writing was on the terrace of Mount Igueldo.
I do not know very well what happened because I was 9 years old, but I have the writing that came out of there.
I was watching the landscape and suddenly I felt that I had to write something.
Since she was always very rare, as she did not fit with people.
That, in some way, I had to purge it through writing.
It was my way of saying: I feel super rare, but here I can be me and I can know that nobody is going to judge me.

Q. At age 17, it calls you an editorial because you see your poems on the Internet and it says: ‘We want to publish’.
How is that moment?

R. I thought they were hesitating me.
I had that first contract that I had to sign with my mother because she was younger, but she was super exciting.
I had zero expectations.
I thought: But who is going to read this?
My editor told me that we were going to open a period of pre-sale and in a week we sold more than 700 copies.
Exemplary of those who, by the way, I have never seen anything because this turkey went to Mexico with the money of all the authors.

Q. How?
Did she be passed?

R. He stuck several parties in Madrid and then left.
Other authors were also.
Elvira Sastre, Borja Sémper, Amarna Miller … We were enough.
And, nothing, not a euro.

Q. When publishers begin to bet on you, does the pressure grow?

A. I have always felt a pressure of living up.
It is something that also happens to me in my personal life.
Would you erase some books that I have written?
Yes. But hey, it’s already.
In fact, I think the first book is much better than the second.

Q. Now that you have a well-known couple [Her boyfriend is Willy Bárcenas, Stool singer and son of Luis Bárcenas], do you remember when writing?
Do you try to avoid getting out of ‘double senses’?

R. At the time of writing, no.
But, for example, there are many people who say that I have benefited myself professionally from my relationship.
And to me all my colleagues, my editors, my editorials, have told me that it has been wrong.
That what he has done is that people judged me from another prism, which was not the one that I had been curating from 17 years old.
So, why do I leave my relationship?
That’s why I stop fighting?
No. Obviously, I choose the person with whom I am and choose to fight for that person.
And, it is more, defend it when it creates necessary and be there at the foot of the horses with everything that comes.
Because I only know how to love like that and I still think it’s worth it for all the good thing that gives me, it’s a lot more than anyone can imagine.
But I know that in my professional life it has harmed me.

Q. You are young, but you have been published six books.
Do you consider yourself a mature writer?

R. that goes.
Nothing nothing.
I think that will give it time.
I think it will come a time when time will make a filter with all the people who start in this networks and will say: you, yes or you, no.
Now I am Loreto and I do things.
I publish things that go through my head and I feel or I suffer.

Q. So, at what time one becomes a writer?

A. Publish books makes you a writer?
I think not, for example.
Because there are many people, many people!, Who publishes books and are not writers.
I think it makes you a writer a literary trajectory.

Q. Can you live from poetry or live with poetry?

R. of poetry … Ugh, yes and no.
This is like everything, what do you need to live?
It depends.
If you live in Madrid, it also depends on the rent.
But I, for example, I paid my career with poetry books, and went to a private university.
I mean, that something gives you.

Q. In addition to writing, you studied journalism and work in a communication agency.
With what do you enjoy more?

A. There are several moments that are always super special.
In general, everything turns that as always I am afraid of failure, to that everything goes wrong, if something goes well, I enjoy the triple.
When they send you the printed book for the first time home it is a super momantazo.
In fact, my first editor, who died, Belén Bermejo, always sent me or tried to send me, the first book that came out of the printing press.

Q. Where does that distrust come to you to think whenever everything is going to go wrong?

R. Well, because I’m super insecure.
Very unsafe.
In fact, people think that I like the world for my attitude, because as I am cold or hermetic it seems that things sweat to me.
And no, it’s upside down.
It is an important tare in my life, because in the end that also affects me how I relate to people.
People think that by putting you a tube dress with heels I am already safer from myself.
It does not have any kind of sense.
Maybe, in fact, I try to hide in that tube dress.
I try to work it, really, I put all my effort to do it, but it is true that sometimes I eat.
I really eat me, paralyze me.

Q. I like to comment it because many times we stay alone with the first impression

A. This is something that I express in social networks.
It’s clear that I’m afraid.
It is my passion, is that it is what has made me different, in good sense, from a child.
If you take me out that, you are removing me the most important part of me.
We all have a brillite in something.
Sometimes it is at the professional plane, sometimes in the staff, sometimes because of how you are … my little brilliant is that.

Q. Do you try to have tact when it comes to handling your language with regard to feminism?
Do you try to use feminist or inclusive terms?

A. I do not care because I think you do not have to have it.
The problem of society in which we live is that everyone measures exactly what it says so that they do not tell you what.
And in the end it is not clear what people think.
Like people I think it’s not sincere with the game you vote.
People are not honest.
I think, for example, at the Madrid movement, on how the cultural course of this country change.
There people made history because he was able to disinhibit and be the person who had been alibi for many years.
I hope that one day people can free themselves.

Q. Do you really think that people openly will say what they should think of social networks by means of it?

R. It is what we have done throughout our lives.
Because now no?
Why now you can not say: I think this although that is not what most think?
It seems to me a new censorship and over without having the clear yoke.
It is that it is: “It is that people on Twitter are going to stand up.”
But, who is “people on Twitter”?
Who are they?
What names do they have?
How many?
Maybe these people would be somehow withdrawn if everyone was able to say what they think.
You have to be brave.
We are not exposed in a showcase.

Q. From the inclusive language what do you think?

A. I think there are more important things.
It is important?
Yes. I think they are the little things that in the end make us have behavior or another.
But it seems to me more important to keep in mind that in the latest surveys most teenagers have macho behaviors with their brides.
It seems to me more important to go to a classroom and tell a kid: hey, it turns out that you can not tell your girlfriend with 15 years how she has to dress.
I, for example, I am very sensitive to the whole issue of gender violence.
And it seems to me that this is something to be cut.
And that is cut with education, it is cut talking about it.
Then, talking about it is not going out with a banner to the street.
Less pancartite, less painted the purple face, and more to help those women who fear for their lives every day.